Psychotic
Imprisonment
By Maryya Dean Rajkumar
Looking at the
title of this book, you know there is something in store for you that is going
to let you see into someone else's life. The title alone leaves you to wonder
if there will be a way out, after you open the cover, and begin reading. But
wait, the cover then gets your attention. Divided in half, darkness and beauty,
colors and nightfall. A scared little girl covering her ears in a field of
sunflowers, and in the dirt path you see words such as: hurt, demons and angry.
Now we know we within this book, we are in store for a story of something that
someone went through, that they have decided to open up their heart, their
world, and their lives to share with us.
Within this book,
I could feel everything, even as a little girl that Maryya went through. I would
cringe, and cry, laugh, and see the things as if I were right there with her,
standing by her side. So many things she kept inside, so many things she didn’t
understand, even today, there are still some.
Maryya reminisces through
her childhood through poetry, and words both, recollecting pain, and hurt, and
even good memories. She has written her words, not only so that she can move
forward, but so that others can see, they too, are not alone.
Many people suffer
from invisible diseases such as: depression, PTSD, postpartum depression, bipolar
disorder, schizophrenia, menopause, PMS, post and premenopausal, perimenopausal,
pregnancy mood swings, grief, and many other ailments that can affect the mind;
so many that there are actually too many to list! And sadly, there is not any
perfected way to treat any of these symptoms, or signs, and disorders. Not to
mention, it usually takes medical insurance and/or money to get the proper
attention anyway.
Once, when Maryya
was quite young, she felt that she alone could raise her own sister better than
her Mother could. So, she decided she had had enough, and took her sister and
tried to run away. It was then that she ‘kind of’ realized that perhaps she
needed help, but stubborn as she is/was, once they were found, she explained to
her Mother, being honest, that more-or-less, she felt her Mother was too busy,
and that she herself could do a much better job at Mothering her sister,
because she was already doing it anyway.
As you may have
noted, Maryya was not an only child, and as I stated, she was a stubborn one.
She liked to make a difference, and felt she could if she tried.
In School, she
experienced being bullied, because their Mother insisted that they wear the
head gear making them ‘seem’ like ‘terrorists’ to the ‘normal’ people. Maryya
put up with for quite some time, and her Father told her, ‘Just remember, you
will grow up and become something of yourself, and the bad person will not. You’ll
see one day.’ Maryya wrote, remembering in her book, as she seen the bully
later in life, and she smiled when she seen her in the grocery store. She didn’t
smile at her bully, but at herself, because her Father’s words had rung true in
her head, when she had seen exactly what her bully had amounted to, and
knowingly what Maryya herself had amounted to.
Maryya has gone
through any things, and I do not wish to expose the entire book here in the
review, what I want is for you to read it. I feel you need to. Because once you
do, you too will be over whelmed. This book is truly an eye opener, and it will
help you see that not everyone is the same, and yet, here we all are, suffering
in one way or another. And Maryya tells us, yes, it is okay to talk about it,
share, and let others know, that yes, we need help, and that we’re suffering,
and need them. It is ok to reach out, and it is ok to speak up, because others
need to know, and we need to support one another.
This book is a five-star
read, especially for someone who has never published before. The poems are very
deep and heart felt, and the words are very intriguing. You will be glad that
you read this book, because there will be a part of you that can relate, I’ll
bet on it.
Here are my questions for Maryya:
1. What made you write your book and how long did it take
you?
During the course of my counseling and
mental health treatment I was encouraged to express myself through writing and
every member of the team responsible for my care who had seen my poetry had
felt very strongly that I need to share my talents with the world. It is their
belief that this book would help other people, both in their care and working
with sufferers of mental illnesses, to understand better and to raise awareness
of these conditions and what the people who have them deal with on a day-to-day
basis.
I have to admit, it was with a great deal of trepidation
that I took on the task of putting my experiences down on paper, being an Asian
woman of Pakistani descent, it was difficult to contemplate being different,
bringing it out in the open to the attention of others was unfathomable. Since
its publication I feel I have taken the boldest of steps to break my silence.
From building the courage to finally writing this book I
only spent 3 months.
Yes it was very hard but It was all there in my mind, I had lived each moment and it was eating at me. I'm glad to have done this and taken the steps I have, in some respect I’ve freed a part of that captured prisoner in me.
On my journey of
managing my demons and staying strong in the face of terror and pain I found
strength and courage through tiny hands and feet that called me mummy.
3. Do you have any photos to share with us? Yes, this photo is of me, when I was 7 years old, the rest can be found on my social media sights.
4. Do you plan on writing another book?
Yes, I do intend to write a more detailed dissected version
of my current book, detailing each and every chapter, answering possible
questions that may be running on the readers mind. I also hope to find the
strength to write about sexual abuse in children one day.
We all find different
things that give us strength, we all need those things. This book is already
touching the lives of many and I have shocked and astounded many around me-
some that didn't think I would do it, and others that didn't think I could do
it. But I have done it, if your belief is strong enough then your willpower is
your weapon. The book is already generating a lot of
interest from psychiatrists to those not directly affected. It's been rated 5*
since its publication a month ago.
It is also being recommended to patients, to men and women
suffering with mental illness. And people around the world are inquiring about
the book.
6. What are your hobbies?
My greatest hobby is being a mum, as cliché as this may
sound it is actually one million percent true, I love being a mum, I love
teaching my children new things together we are a great team, we learn of each
other. Academically I wasn’t very good in secondary school and didn’t achieve
the desired grades, when you read my book you’ll know why. But being a mother
of four, I am learning each and every day, the ways of life the natural skills
of being a mum but most importantly how to be a good role model to my children.
7. Did anyone complain when you wrote and released your book?
7. Did anyone complain when you wrote and released your book?
No not as yet, but I
am very aware that I will be in the firing line and may raise some eye brows,
for a few bold statements that I have made on back of my personal opinion and experiences.
On a personal note, I wrote this autobiography to express my vision my views my
life, I did not feel happy about writing about my life and trying to be
diplomatic, I guess with me honesty is far too important, what you see is what
you get.
8. What are your future plans?
8. What are your future plans?
I plan to one day start up my own business in event
planning. I also will continue writing, I have been approached to give talks at
the mental health recovery colleges and schools. When I am ready I may in the
near future prepare myself to take that huge leap.
9. Are you still suffering through stress and depression? Or even regression?
9. Are you still suffering through stress and depression? Or even regression?
Yes, my belief is strong enough to say bipolar is not just a
depression it’s an illness, and I am fighting that every day of my life and will
continue to do so. Unfortunately for me, I have a fluctuating pattern with my
breakdowns and the worst points of my suffering are at the beginning and at the
end of the year where I am most likely to be sectioned. But on a positive note
i am taking my medication every day to help me manage my moods, and writing has
clearly been a winner for me to find a therapeutic way to handle my anxiety.
10. Do you have any advice to offer anyone who may have gone through several situations that you may have been through?
10. Do you have any advice to offer anyone who may have gone through several situations that you may have been through?
You’re not alone, actually you’re far from that, the fact
that you have come to a realization that something is not right with you, is
actually the bravest thing anyone can do, the strength and willpower in you to
fight and cope has already begun and will take shape when you can find that
perfect medium or strategy in yourself to cope. Which you will, be strong and be
hopeful.
11. Please share with us your social media links and book links
12. Anything you’d
like to add:
I would like to
take this opportunity to say a great big thank you to Deneale for taking the
time out to read my book and giving me the opportunity to speak out and express
myself.
Psychotic Imprisonment by Maryya Dean RajkumarMy rating: 5 of 5 stars
Looking at the title of this book, you know there is something in store for you that is going to let you see into someone else’s life. The title alone leaves you to wonder if there will be a way out, after you open the cover, and begin reading. But wait, the cover then gets your attention. Divided in half, darkness and beauty, colors and nightfall. A scared little girl covering her ears in a field of sunflowers, and in the dirt path you see words such as: hurt, demons and angry. Now we know we within this book, we are in store for a story of something that someone went through, that they have decided to open up their heart, their world, and their lives to share with us.
Within this book, I could feel everything, even as a little girl that Maryya went through. I would cringe, and cry, laugh, and see the things as if I were right there with her, standing by her side. So many things she kept inside, so many things she didn’t understand, even today, there are still some.
Maryya reminisces through her childhood through poetry, and words both, recollecting pain, and hurt, and even good memories. She has written her words, not only so that she can move forward, but so that others can see, they too, are not alone.
Many people suffer from invisible diseases such as: depression, PTSD, postpartum depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, menopause, PMS, post and premenopausal, perimenopausal, pregnancy mood swings, grief, and many other ailments that can affect the mind; so many that there are actually too many to list! And sadly, there is not any perfected way to treat any of these symptoms, or signs, and disorders. Not to mention, it usually takes medical insurance and/or money to get the proper attention anyway.
Many times, by the time a person is or has become fed up with the World or a situation, it is usually too late. Many people resort to suicide, or lose the desire to live. Which when you read Maryya’s book, you will find that even she was led to feel that she wasn’t important enough, or needed, and wanted, or had a purpose, on several occasions.
Once when Maryya was quite young, she felt that she alone could raise her own sister better than he Mother could. So, she decided she had had enough, and took her sister and tried to run away. It was then that she ‘kind of’ realized that perhaps she needed help, but stubborn as she is/was, once they were found, she explained to her Mother, being honest, that more-or-less, she felt her Mother was too busy, and that she herself could do a much better job at Mothering her sister, because she was already doing it anyway.
As you may have noted, Maryya was not an only child, and as I stated, she was a stubborn one. She liked to make a difference, and felt she could if she tried.
In School, she experienced being bullied, because their Mother insisted that they wear the head gear making them ‘seem’ like ‘terrorists’ to the ‘normal’ people. Maryya put up with for quite some time, and her Father told her, ‘Just remember, you will grow up and become something of yourself, and the bad person will not. You’ll see one day.’ Maryya wrote, remembering in her book, as she seen the bully later in life, and she smiled when she seen her in the grocery store. She didn’t smile at her bully, but at herself, because her Father’s words had rung true in her head, when she had seen exactly what her bully had amounted to, and knowingly what Maryya herself had amounted to.
Maryya has gone through any things, and I do not wish to expose the entire book her in the review, what I want is for you to read it. I feel you need to. Because once you do, you too will be over whelmed. This book is truly an eye opener, and it will help you see that not everyone is the same, and yet, here we all are, suffering in one way or another. And Maryya tells us, yes, it is okay to talk about it, share, and let others know, that yes, we need help, and that we’re suffering, and need them. It is ok to reach out, and it is ok to speak up, because others need to know, and we need to support one another.
This book is a five-star read, especially for someone who has never published before. The poems are very deep and heart felt, and the words are very intriguing. You will be glad that you read this book, because there will be a part of you that can relate, I’ll bet on it.
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